Before you start reading – I actually wrote this early this morning, before launching off on a day of errand running. My bride read it and agreed it was ok, but had this to say: “Man, we’re boring people…”
Ah, yes.
Yesterday at about 2, 2:30 in the afternoon, we marked ten years of marriage. If you saw my twitter/facebook feed yesterday, you saw me thank Kim for putting up with me, and I stand by that. I’m cranky, with occasional bouts of grouchiness. I’m needy, and have unquenchable, unrealistic goals.
Yep. I’m a man.
I don’t want to mislead you, especially if you’ve yet to take the plunge. Its not perfect. We don’t always agree. We definitely don’t see eye to eye all the time. But I’ve always stuck with a simple rule:
Never go to bed angry.
And believe it or not, I think its this simple rule that has been the foundation of a happy marriage. If you struggle and keep true to the rule, you can’t hold a grudge. How do you stay mad at someone only in spurts? You don’t.
And man, do I love her.
Last night, we had potstickers and fresh (fresh!) sushi (maki rolls). Why, we ordered so much we have enough left over for a lunchtime feast 🙂 Kim isn’t the biggest maki fan, but was willing and happy to share some shrimp tempura and let me have some dragon roll. Tonight, one of my bestest friends (no favors called in, just had to ask) will watch the girls from about 4:30 until whenever Kim and I make it home. You have to understand, this is like the first time we’ve gone out for a night time date in years. We’ve had a few afternoons free in the last few years, don’t get me wrong, but this is our first prime time outing in years. Alone. As adults.
As an interesting sidebar, the same bestest friend was not only there for our wedding, but at the time lived in an apartment across the street. When we got home from the reception (wild party animals that we were), she came over, had pizza with us, and helped us sort through the wedding presents. Pretty ironic, then, that ten years later, she’s going to have pizza with our girls while we celebrate. OK, maybe not movie script romance for a wedding night, but reality is that after standing around all day in hot, heavy clothing, all you want to do is veg out and cool off.
Now tonight, we aren’t going to a fancy, expensive restaurant. Oh, we had considered it, believe me. We scoured around the Fredneck area digs, looking for somewhere with a menu that appealed, budget no obstacle. Mostly. The thing is, we realized that we weren’t interested in some kind of high class, painting the town kind of evening. All we wanted is to go out and have some fun.
With three girls under the age of ten (or eight), and having very limited babysitter resources, we don’t get to go out too much. And with our youngest’s allergies, a restaurant must be able to not only provide fare for our our whole disjointed family, but not make one of our children severely ill or worse. Yeah, believe it or not, not too many places fit that bill, and so we don’t get to try too much unless they deliver.
So back to tonight. We’re going to the Capital Ale House. A beergarden with an impressive menu of German and Americana (all in the beergarden vein). We’re not dressing up, we don’t have reservations, and we don’t have a plan. We’re just going out to have some fun and enjoy each
others company.
Because you know what? After ten years of marriage, I still love spending time with my wife. The things she says put me in stitches. Her observations are startling and insightful. People use that trite
expression "you complete me," or "she’s my better half," but I feel like I’m one of the only people that actually knows what that means. She’s the part of me that I didn’t know I was missing, the part of me that I couldn’t appreciate until it was there.
Love you, babe. A lot.