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Posted by mcummings
Sorry its been so quiet on here lately. We've just been through the double header of birthdays, the first few weeks of school, and all the baggage that that carries with it. Need something to make you smile? Imagine this: six years old and dressed herself. Leopard print top, plaid skort, boots. I think this is her favorite outfit. Its also school pictures day.
Then there's the wonderful world of writing. I wish I had something more productive to say on that subject. About a month ago, I threw in the towel on writing (no worries, my friend Christine caught the towel and is holding it safe - or in ransom - for me). What I was writing was feeling incredibly derivative and shallow. There was a lot going on, but for me, no sense of depth or emotion motivating it. Oh, I knew so and so was motivated by her deep seated but misguided and misdirected thirst for revenge, but that thirst never showed up in the story. Not even a draught. And while that may be all fine and good to fix in the second draft, that wouldn't fix the feeling that I was just rehashing other people's good ideas poorly.
“The first draft of anything is shit”.
Earnest Hemingway
Sure, there's nothing new to write about, everything is a retelling of the primordial tales, but this was seriously inexcusable rehashing. And I couldn't even justify it. There were gimicks that were there only for when they were useful, serious big time McGuffins.
And then there was the greatest crime of all. Each attempt at the novel project may have been a new story, but it carried with it the baggage of everything that went before it. Each one was set on the same world, with the same rules, identifying names, places, and landmarks, leading to a stifling writing experience. Yes, I realize that this helps the final story feel like it takes place in a real world, resonating true. It is also incredibly constraining, reeling back creativity to fit within the confines of an already established, albeit unpublished, milieu.
Some people have trunk novels. Me? I have trunk universes. I've got the science fiction universe in which sentient plants are pitted against man while ancient beings live hidden within singularities where the laws of physics are more to their liking; fantasy worlds where magic comes and goes in seasons, each season lasting for years, sometimes centuries. These are the trunk worlds of M. P. Cummings.
And its time for me to close the lid.
I haven't completely given up on writing, though. A few small embers still glow, a few new stories are slowly being written. Maybe I should change hobbies, pick something simple like nanite construction or advanced biochemical manufacturing for fun and profit.
Nah. Where's the fun in that?
Write or DIE!
Posted by mcummings
OK, so when I wasn't moping around the house or out with Kim running errands/eating/enjoying the company of my lovely bride, I did manage to get zombie kills in. Oh, and some writing 
Biggest bang for the buck came using Write or Die - I know, I know, but really, it was great. My first test was with the settings as suicidal as they come - evil grace in kamikaze mode. If you slowed down too much, the background started changing colors. Stopped for more than a few seconds and words started erasing off the screen. Nothing can keep those fingers moving faster than the threat that everything you've written will be erased if you stop. I'm tempted to fork over the $10 for the Adobe Air desktop version of the app - case in point, Sunday night I set the lofty goal of 1500 words in an hour, and after only 42 minutes had 1624 words written. Yes, there is the threat that being forced to write like this you might find yourself just babbling in parts, but anything that helps get the first draft out of your head can't be a bad thing.
So if you're one of my writing buddies, check it out. Web app is completely free - the only advantage I see to getting the desktop app is portability and more controls, but the basics are there for free.
Another nice rejection
Posted by mcummings
Its been eight months since I wrote Dark Lord Rising (recently retitled to The Captain and the Dark Lord, for consistency in the milieu). To be brutally blunt, I've been living in denial with this piece.
Fantasy Magazine gave me my first nice rejection with this piece, leaving a personal note that was very encouraging. Beneath Ceaseless Skies was also great, taking the time to actually point out the flaws of the story in addition to encouraging me onward. But did I listen to this advise? No! Of course not! I plowed ahead and sent the story to Heroic Fantasy Quarterly, who got back to me late last night with another rejection, repeating a lot of what BCS said.
There were other rejections before these, but these last three stand out for me because A) they were the last three, and B) in each case, the overworked editors took the time to send me a note with the rejection. In all cases, they welcomed new works for review, rejected this story, and gave me some advise on why this story failed for them. The sad thing is that after sending the HFQ, I started taking what Scott at BCS said seriously, recognizing the flaws he pointed out. But by then, as they say, the die was already cast and the story was already sitting in the queue at BCS.
What I've taken from these three editors is the reassurance that my writing isn't crap, that when I sit down and tell a story, its still a worthy read. The problem in this case is that the story itself has intrinsic flaws that make it unsalable, at least in respectable markets.
Working against my lofty New Year's resolution right now is that I've spent most of the year, when I'm actually writing, working on a novel. A novel that isn't showing a lot of progress, although in the last week I've had a mental break through that should get the story moving forward again. My goal, for the bored, was to either be published this year, or to finish a novel. As it stands right now with over half the year past, I won't make either goal. And that kind of stings.
I wish I was better at multitasking and juggling my schedules. Rationally, there is no reason I couldn't write a few more short stories, release them into the wild, and work on the novel at the same time - while balancing family/work/life. Other people do it all the time. What I think I lack is discipline. Because there is no burning mandate to achieve these writing goals, the fate of the family/work/life don't hang in the balance of my success, I let myself be distracted (LeftForDead2 anybody?).
And I don't think this is something I'm going to answer in this blog post. But that's where I stand.
And so goes another week
Posted by mcummings
Summer is winding down. In our house, this isn't a bad thing - the kids are looking forward to going back, and we're looking forward to them going back. The only sad part is that it also marks the end of the little one being a baby. OK, so she hasn't been a "baby" in a long while, but this year she starts pre-K, which is kind of a threshold that says "Now she's a school age child with big-little kid issues and activities."
Yeah, I'm man enough to say it makes me sad. But then, so did sitting on the couch this morning watching the last episode of the season for Doctor Who. I'm an emotional wash out when it comes to machismo. I know.
But with the winding down of summer comes the realization that the year is over half done. And yet of my goals for the year (recorded here just so I couldn't forget...or deny it...), not a one has come to pass. #1 - not so much. We've had a long string of ill fortunes this year, nothing that stops us from being a happy family unit with a roof over our heads and a job and such, but at the same time, not what I would refer to as a year filled with good fortunes. Or even passably middling fortunes. I've written, but I think it would be a big old fib to say "a lot." More like "a bit more than naught" if you want to be precise. Which leaves being published. There's where I've gotten closest so far this year, something I can honestly say I've made a good effort at.
Except, in some ways, not so much there either. It is true, I have stuff out there right now. And rumor has it that's the biggest step in getting something published - actually putting your stuff out there. The reason I hesitate to say that its a roaring success (besides not actually being published yet) is that I haven't continued to write and push. I'm still pushing around the same two or three stories that I started the year with.
And yet somehow I manage to keep posting long entries to this blog. Seems to me I might have a problem of priorities there. I've promised "Forgotten Realm" posts each month, and I intend to follow through on that promise, but I think I need to start toning back these nice, long, babbling articles about how this or that writing project is going, and instead focus on actually, you know, writing.
So, see you on the other side of my rewrite of the second Captain story. Wish me luck, have a great weekend, and stay hydrated, its a doozy out there.
I’m full of character!! (Aren’t I?)
Posted by mcummings
Its funny - in a somewhat scary way - to see where the Muse hides out. The major WIP has been sidelined this last week to do some work on the last Captain story, and the Muse has enjoyed the vacation. In the process of working on this story, a few interesting facts came up. First, the frightening realization that it was long enough (in first draft form) to be considered a novellete - that is, over 7 thousand words. Despite my best efforts, I find word counts fascinating still, I guess, since this length was achieved with only a few hours of typing a story that seemed to flow naturally from my fingers. (Oh, why don't they all do that???)
I sent the story off this week to two people who have known me for almost half my life (scary). Both were great sports about being alpha readers, sending me back the honest feedback I needed. From my first reader, I got back in depth detail (line by line) of where the story seemed to rush, or break down, etc. Awesome!
From my second alpha reader, I received comments that were hauntingly similar. They were pretty much the same comments that I'd received from an editor for my other Captain story, namely that the narrator (the Captain) wasn't coming through much, that there was more telling than showing going on. Ouch. I'd get defensive, except this was the second time someone had said that about these stories.
So now, at the back of my mind as I do a retype (printed out the first draft, retyping it from scratch - it helps to catch awkward wording and introduce new bits seamlessly), I'm painfully aware that I might be committing the same foible again. Why don't my characters have character? Why don't they feel like people to other folks? These are the kinds of questions I need to wrestle with. I know the technical answers that the books teach for making your characters seem more real, but applying them is a different thing all together.
And that's where things stand with the writing this week. I'm hoping the week ahead sees a successful second draft of the Captain story, along with a little bit of writing on the larger WIP. Frankly, though, I'd settle for some writing at all. I keep think of Gurney Halleck whenever I have trouble getting in the "mood" for writing - "Not in the mood?! Mood's a thing for cattle and love play..." (Yes, I realize this is the second time this quote has appeared on this blog - what can I say, it comes to mind often).
That's it for this morning's update. Talk to you all subsequently! 